I haven’t done any blog posts or spoken much at all about wedding planning, how I prepared or about the day itself however I felt quite compelled to write this post.

I was one of the first out of my friendship group to get married and we often reflect on the day now and the lead up and I’ve found that what I have come away with is some advice for bride to be’s on how to stay calm. Don’t ask me why or how! Well actually do… haha!

I’m not often the most calm person in the room, far from it in fact but for some reason I felt such a sense of serenity in the lead up and on the morning of the wedding itself. The day before my wedding, my Mum said I was the most chilled out bride she had ever seen. This didn’t just “happen”; I put things in place to make sure I looked after myself and my mental health in the lead up and on the day itself.

I struggle with change, I struggle with attention, I struggle with pressure and wham bam throw a wedding in the mix plus a pandemic and you have yourself a cocktail for disaster in my brain. At first I tried super hard to not make the wedding a BIG DEAL!

BUT…

Getting married is a pretty BIG deal. The fact that it’s meant to be the best day of your life is enough pressure in itself right! The thoughts like “what if it’s not the best day of my life?”, “what if I don’t feel my best?”, “what if I’ve got PMS on the day?” plus hundred million more thoughts were constantly coming into my head.

Getting married is such a wonderful sparkly experience but it also carries with it so much emotional baggage even when you keep trying to put that baggage down, it jumps back on for a piggy back.

It’s kind of inevitable that there’s going to be an element of stress in the lead up but the few days before , and especially the morning of, it should all be about letting go and enjoying your special day and I hope some of my little tips will help you prioritise you in your moment as a bride. You deserve it.

The Night Before

Whether you have a big event planned the night before or just something quiet organised I’d urge you to try not to over do it with the booze. We all know that even two drinks can cause broken sleep and make you wake up feeling a little on the rough side.

I had a rehearsal at about 4pm the day before and then we had our closest friends and family round for a meal and a few drinks. I had about half a glass of wine and then went upstairs to my room about 9pm.

I had a long bath and was in bed reading by 9:45pm. This peaceful alone time really helped settle me and it was really nice knowing that my friends and family were having a fab time and getting to know each other downstairs.

Something else I’d really encourage you to do is to turn your phone off from the night before until the day after the wedding. I gave all the people that needed to contact me, like the florist, the make up artist, the photographer etc one of my bridesmaids numbers and everyone else I knew would contact my Mum or my hubby to be if they really needed to.

It was so freeing to have one less thing to worry about and to not have the constant pinging of my phone going off throughout the weekend. You don’t need it! Everyone you love will be there.

The Morning Of

I was lucky to have slept really well however I woke up super early. About 5am! Whether you’ve slept well or not, don’t stress! The body is amazing and it will get you through the day whether you’ve had 8 hours sleep or 2 hours.

I knew I wouldn’t be able to fall back to sleep so I decided to just get up and have a shower and a little pamper. There was something about being up before everyone else on my wedding day that felt very peaceful and exciting.

I also made sure I had a nice nourishing big breakfast. You probably won’t be eating again until much later on in the day so something to settle your stomach and keep you going is important. Have something that you are used to and that you love!

Before my make up artist and everyone else arrived, I took about 20 minutes to be in nature and take some deep breathes. No phone, no music, no people, just silence and my breathing. I also wrote down some affirmations which I repeated in my head. This almost makes you feel a bit invinsible.

When everyone started to arrive with excited nerves and adrenaline, I found that from taking those quiet meditative moments for myself, I was centred and didn’t feel like I needed to take on the busy energy around me. I was in a little bubble of peace.

As it got nearer to leaving for the church, I did start to feel some nerves kicking in and one of my bridesmaids was amazing and helped me breathe and stay grounded. She held my hand and told me to follow her breathe, she talked me through grounding my feet into the earth and feeling my body in the present moment. I’d recommend having a dedicated friend whose role is to simply keep you calm.

It’s Your Time

Regardless of all the above, just know that when you walk down that aisle something else will come over you. You will put one foot in front of the other and you’ll be by your partners side. Keep focused on them and on why you are there. You have decided to get married and today is your day. Nothing else matters except the two of you and your beautiful love.

Photographer: Rebecca Rees (A Thing Like That)

Dress: Laure De Sagazan (The Mews Bridal)

Shoes: Rachel Simpson

Make Up and Hair: Quelle Bester (A Bridal Edit)

Flowers: Blossom and Threads